Max Bemis and Sherri DuPree Starting New Project Tuesday, Aug 25 2009 

The Bemises - The New Carpenters, But Even Less Punk

The Bemises - The New Carpenters, But Even Less Punk

According to Max Bemis’ Twitter, he and his wife Sherri DuPree-Bemis (who sings in “indie-rock-for-kids-who-don’t-like-indie-rock” band, Eisley) will be making some music together in the future. Frankly, I’m not sure whether or not scene kids can handle so much mediocrity in one group. This project has a lot of potential. I mean, I thought Max Bemis has officially set the standard for terribly bland music when he released In Defense of the Genre. Then, he topped himself with Two Tongues, mixing his flavorless songwriting with the nasally whines of Chris Conley to create a triumphantly unappealing record. For a second there, I actually thought there wasn’t a musical concept left that could possibly move me to tears of boredom so effortlessly.

This time, however, I have faith in Max Bemis. After all, one look at the song-titles on his new album will let you know that Sherri DuPree-Bemis has already had a disastrous effect on Bemis’ already underwhelming song-writing ability (it takes balls for a 25 year-old man to write a song called “Crush’d”). Bemis and DuPree-Bemis have the opportunity to construct one of the landmark albums of our generation, the one by which all other albums are compared. I can see it now…

Dave Grohl: How do you like our new record?
Friend: Dude, it’s absolute garbage.
Dave Grohl: Oh… well, at least it’s not as bad as that Bemis-To-Bemis album, amirite?
Friend: Oh, absolutely. I’d rather listen to Bjork have an orgasm than sit through that piece of shit.
Dave Grohl: I’m just glad Kurt’s gone. He never has to hear it.


One Week Break Thursday, Aug 20 2009 

I’m packing up and moving back Charlotte, NC for another semester of school this week. I won’t have too much spare time to post here so, in the meantime, follow me on Twitter ( in order to get my random opinions on things while I’m away.

New Weezer Album Titled Raditude, Possibly The Lamest Title Ever Tuesday, Aug 18 2009 

With a band like this, Im surprised that Im surprised the new title is so dorky.

With a band like this, I'm surprised that I'm surprised the new title is so dorky.

According to Interscope’s website, Weezer’s seventh studio album will be titled Raditude. I find myself a little conflicted on this title. Adorable dorkiness has been a part of Weezer’s appeal since they first hit the scene with The Blue Album, so it’s only to be expected that the band would retain some of that nerdy appeal. However, I saw the band’s latest album, The Red Album, as a kind of growing up record, one that signaled the band have moved past the teenage dorkdome and had, instead, adopted a much more mature, self-aware lameness, like that of a 40 year-old father of two living through a midlife crisis. While this album title does not necessarily rule out that theory, when coupled with the live songs we have heard so far and the leaked single (which has been pulled from YouTube for copyright violations), I find myself worried that Weezer are now backtracking to the overly shallow pop-rock of The Green Album.

Hey Weezer, if you’re going to backtrack, why not just jump all the way back to Pinkerton?

Max Bemis Hates Everyone… We Hate You Too, Max Monday, Aug 17 2009 

All you had to do was grow a beard, Max.

All you had to do was grow a beard, Max.

Max Bemis is quickly replacing Rivers Cuomo as the artist who disappoints with more striking consistency. When Two Tongues was first released, I was still a Say Anything fan. Needless to say, the record’s boring musicality and complete lack of fascinating lyrics took a toll on my Say Anything fandom. Now, with the release of “Hate Everyone”, the first single from Say Anything’s self-titled fourth record, I can unilatterally declare that I am no longer a Say Anything fan. In fact, I may just hate them.

This song makes me think not even Max Bemis understands exactly why the band’s second album …Is a Real Boy was so damn good. You see, that album had a certain self-deprecating humor about it that was instantly appealing to sixteen year-old Dion. Now, as I near my 20th birthday, perhaps I have simply outgrown Max Bemis’ antics. Or, more likely, Say Anything has forgotten the subtlety that used to blanket their raggedy punk rock sound. What we’re left with now is a glorified joke song that would be more at home on a Weird Al Yankovich parody of Weezer. The music shamelessly rips off “I Found The Law” while the lyrics are little more than line after line of tongue-in-cheek (read: stupid) self-deprecating lyrics.

Max Bemis has always benefited from being the main character of his own songs. Well, it seems that the character has become a bit of a Gary Stu, a walking stereotype, lacking any interesting characteristics. I seriously don’t think I have the patience to listen to 45 minutes of Max Bemis pretending to be fascinating, as it appears that’s all this record will be; twelve of so songs of Bemis masturbating himself. How odd that one of the people Bemis claims to hate are “actors who seem genuine”. Max, I hate to break it to you, but that is all you’ve become; an actor.

Radiohead Giving Away New Song For Free Monday, Aug 17 2009 

Our Paranoid Androids are just as cool as they were in the 90s.

Our Paranoid Androids are just as cool as they were in the 90's.

A few days back, I posted about a new Radiohead song that had leaked onto the web. Never to be a band that scoffs at the relationship between music and the internet, Radiohead have decided to give away the song for free. It can be downloaded here. There is nothing cooler than a band that understands music is not about selling and buying but about delivering quality tunes to a fan who loves their music. What impresses me the most is that Radiohead is ten times as big and ten times are good as most other bands making popular music today, and they still give away free music and play free shows whenever they get the chance. These younger bands need to take a tip from Radiohead; when you respect your fans, they will respect you.

All that’s left to ask is what purpose this track is supposed to serve. Is it part of one of those EP’s Thom York mentioned would be coming out of the Radiohead camp? Is it the song from New Moon that Thom York is producing? Is it just a song to make sure tight-jeaned hipsters don’t pass out from lack of Radiohead material (this is one of their first new songs in two years, you know)? Either way, I don’t really care. Yeah, I’d prefer for this to be part of an EP but, in the end, there’s nothing bad about new Radiohead music. Plus, it’s free. What more could you ask for?

The Decomposed Chat – 8/15/2009 Saturday, Aug 15 2009 

Chat time!

Chat time!

Hey guys. Tonight at 7:00PM I’ll be signing onto AIM for about an hour to chat with readers. If you want to share your opinion on the new Radiohead song, Jacquelyn Lee, Cobra Starship’s albums sales, or Paramore, my screen name is:


See you guys tonight!

Cobra Starship Sells Big Saturday, Aug 15 2009 

All the serious face in the world cant convince me to take you seriously, Gabe.

All the "serious face" in the world can't convince me to take you seriously, Gabe.

According to this article, copies of Cobra Starship’s new album Hot Mess are expected to sell 40,000-45,000 units in its debut week. So, everyone give a round of applause to frontman Gabe Saporta, who has finally found what he has always been looking for; money.

You see, Gabe Saporta is the kind of musician I hate. The kind who has legitimate talent as a songwriter and instrumentalist, but instead chooses to give up their sound, ethics, and personality in exchange for a bigger fanbase and a bigger check. Back in the day, jaded emo kids used to call those musicians “sell outs”. As I’ve said before, I am bringing that term back. A lot of hubbub has been made today over my calling Paramore whores. Well, Paramore fans can take solace in the fact that even a whore is better than a sell out, as a whore knows no better than the sell themselves for profit. Gabe Saporta, you should know better.

But, like I said before, I have no hate for a man who wants to get paid. Clearly, he was never in it for the music anyway so why should I care what he does? So, a toast to Gabe Saporta and Cobra Starship. For those of us who won’t be putting our drinks up for this one, here’s a video to relive the glory days of real punk music. Yeah, we may be a bunch of bitter assholes but at least we like good music, right?

New Radiohead EP Rumored Saturday, Aug 15 2009 

Just a few weeks removed from announcing that they had no plans for a new album, Radiohead have set the internet on fire once again. The above video is rumored to be leaked Radiohead song from an upcoming EP. I am one of the many people who were legitimately upset to find out that Radiohead may never release another LP. I arrived to the OK Computer party late, as I have only been a fan of Radiohead for about three months. For a second there, I thought it was odd that as soon as I got into this band, they would quit recording music (continuing my unfortunate trend of only loving bands who no longer record).

With all that now behind us, I have got another new release to which I anxiously look forward (the other being an upcoming LP or EP from Jacquelyn Lee). The leaked track in question is a very solid piece, which would fit at home on Radiohead’s discography somewhere around the Hail to the Thief era, or even on In Rainbows. Without further prattering, I just want to say that I am anxious to hear new material from Radiohead, as it would be a wonderful distraction from all the pop-punk silliness this year has provided.

Follow Up – Paramore Friday, Aug 14 2009 

The prettiest prostitutes in the whore house.

The prettiest prostitutes in the whore house.

The other day, I stumbled across Paramore’s new video for “Ignorance”. Disgusted at the ridiculous audience pandering of both and Paramore, I posted this blog in reference the video, as well as the story presented along side it. Somehow, the post got into the hands of a lone Paramore fan who then proceeded to spread it to other fans, somehow putting down their copy of Twilight long enough to write a few disparaging comments about me.

Now, I make it a point not to dwell on internet drama but I would like to point out that the backlash over my post serves as a great example of my point. Paramore’s fans have been hoodwinked and bamboozled by this young group of “musicians”, or should I say, their record label and management. Paramore has bred a group of fans who genuinely believe a band can be on the cusp of breakup and still put out in album within two years time (which is pretty quick). They believe a haircut actually makes a band more mature. Worst of all, they believe all of this simply because it was hand fed to them for Paramore’s label. Where are the discerning music fans who used to think for themselves? Paramore, and bands like them, are slowly killing off this kind of fan of replacing them with clones.

In my last post, I referred to Paramore as prostitutes. I can think of no better word to describe a group of “musicians” who so willingly whore themselves out for their label, all in exchange for a check in the mail. I’ll admit, it’s heartwarming to see a group of kids care so much about a band that has touched their lives. What disgusts me, however, is that the band holds them in such contempt low enough to feed them lies on a daily basis. Kids, continue to be passionate about the music you love. Flame the shit out of me and defend what you believe in.

But Paramore, you should be ashamed of yourselves.

Edit: Here are some of the brilliant articulate counter-arguments a few Paramore fans have made:

Slarky2 says:
(2 hours ago)

“we shall chop of his legs and feed him to pigs
a little drastic
but he’s a jerk”

(3 hours ago)

“I think this guy is on crack.”

(2 hours ago)

“i just read it… 😦 makes me wanna cry”

New Paramore Video Feigns Maturity Friday, Aug 14 2009 

Pretend to be angry! Now, pretend to be a band!

"Pretend to be angry! Now, pretend to be a band!"

Paramore’s new video for “Ignorance” recently premiered on and reminded me of all the reasons why I dislike this band. Paramore is not the worst band in the world, I suppose. I can admit that there were some sugary sweet pop tunes on their last album, Riot, that I found worthy of “guilty pleasure” status. Hayley Williams has a voice designed for radio plays. If their management just accepted that fact and marketed them as such, I could probably happily ignore Paramore just like I do most other pop-rock bands on the radio (I’m looking at you, We The Kings).

The thing that bothers me about Paramore is the pretense through which they are presented to their audience. This video is a perfect example of that. The insufferable rambling of renown music industry puppet James Montgomery tries to claim the band is maturing in their sound after having a very rough time writing their second record*, as evidenced by the band now wearing darker clothes. Seriously. Darker clothes and a change in haircuts does not a more mature band make. The band’s sound is still exactly as it was on the last record, which sold pretty well. Why, then, does Paramore’s label/management feel the need to pretend as if Paramore had this amazing resurgence as a group? There is something just a little too “storybook” about the band’s claim of the inner-conflict, which despite being dense enough to threaten the band’s future, was magically solved in one day, with enough time left over to write a catchy, radio friendly single.

I’m not buying the story. James Montgomery, MTV, and Paramore will continue to gladly sell this fable to whatever moron will buy it though. I will at least take solace in the fact that there are some who know the truth; Paramore are not a band, they are prostitutes.

*Edit: As many angry thirteen year old girls have pointed out to me over the past five hours, brand new eyes will actually be Paramore’s third shitty album, not their second. I forgot to mention their debut CD, All We Know is Failing Falling.

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